My MIL Has a Weird Habit She Whips Out Every Time We Shop – This Time I Had Enough

I never thought I’d be plotting against my mother-in-law in a grocery store, but desperate times call for desperate measures, right? Let me back up a bit and explain how I ended up in this mess.

My relationship with Janice, my husband’s mom, started off great. We bonded over coffee and long walks, swapping family recipes and gossip like we’d known each other forever. But there was always this one thing that drove me up the wall: her lipstick habit.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m all for trying before you buy, but Janice took it to a whole new level.

We’d be strolling through the makeup aisle, and without missing a beat, she’d grab a brand-new lipstick, swipe it on the back of her hand, and plop it right back on the shelf. Every. Single. Time.

“Janice,” I’d say, trying to keep my cool, “you can’t do that. It’s unsanitary.”

She’d just laugh it off. “Oh, Ella, don’t be such a worrywart. It’s just my hand, not my lips. What’s the big deal?”

Where do I even start? But I bit my tongue, not wanting to rock the boat. That is, until last week when everything went sideways.

We were shopping at our usual haunt. Janice was in rare form, testing every shade of red known to humanity on her hand.

I was pretending to be fascinated by a display of overpriced face masks when I heard it. The dreaded, “Excuse me, ma’am.”

I turned to see a consultant staring at Janice like she’d grown a second head. “Those aren’t testers and it’s against store policy to open and use products without purchasing them.”

Now, I expected Janice to be embarrassed, maybe even apologize. But nope, not my mother-in-law. She puffed up like an angry rooster; her face turning as red as the lipstick smeared across her hand.

“Excuse me?” Janice practically spat the words. “I have every right to test these products before I buy them.”

The consultant’s perfect smile faltered. “We have testers available, ma’am.”

“Testers? Those things everyone’s been pawing at? No, thank you. I prefer to know exactly where my makeup’s been.”

I wanted to melt into the floor. People were starting to stare, and I could see the consultant’s patience wearing thin.

“Ma’am, I understand your concern, but opening new products is theft. If you continue, I’ll have to call security.”

That’s when Janice really lost it. “Theft? Theft! I’ll have you know I’ve been shopping here for years. How dare you accuse me of stealing? Do you know who I am?”

As it turns out, the consultant didn’t know who Janice was, nor did she care. Within minutes, a burly security guard appeared, and we were escorted out of the store.

That night, as I lay in bed replaying the disaster in my head, I knew something had to change. Janice wasn’t going to listen to reason, that much was clear. No, I needed to get creative.

And that’s when the idea hit me. If Janice couldn’t see why her behavior was wrong, maybe I could show her. Give her a taste of her own medicine, so to speak.

The next day, I called up my old buddy, Mike. He owed me a favor, and boy, was I about to cash it in.

“You want me to do what?” Mike’s voice crackled over the phone, disbelief evident even through the bad connection.

“You heard me. I’ll even pay you fifty bucks.”

There was a long pause. “Ella, have you lost your mind?”

I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Look, I know it sounds crazy, but I need to teach my mother-in-law a lesson. She keeps using makeup at the store and putting it back. I want her to see how gross that is.”

Another pause, then a chuckle. “Your family dinners must be fun. Alright, I’m in. But you owe me more than fifty bucks. This is gonna haunt my conscience.”

We hashed out the details, and a week later, I convinced Janice we needed to pick up some things for dinner.

As we entered the bakery section, I spotted Mike. He gave me a subtle nod before reaching for a breadstick. I held my breath, watching as he took a big bite, chewed thoughtfully, then placed the half-eaten stick back in the display.

Janice’s reaction was immediate and exactly what I’d hoped for. Her eyes widened in horror, her mouth dropping open in a perfect ‘O’ of shock.

“Did you see that?” she hissed, grabbing my arm. “That man just… he just ate that breadstick and put it back! That’s disgusting! Someone could buy that!”

I bit back a smile. Hook, line, and sinker. “Really? That’s awful. Maybe we should say something?”

Janice was already marching over to Mike, righteous anger propelling her forward. “Excuse me, sir!”

Mike turned, the picture of innocence. “Yes?”

“I saw what you did,” Janice accused, pointing a finger at his chest. “You can’t just eat food and put it back. That’s unsanitary and, quite frankly, revolting.”

Mike raised an eyebrow. “It’s not like I licked the whole thing. What’s the big deal?”

I watched as Janice sputtered, her face turning that familiar shade of red. It was time to drive the point home.

“It’s kind of like when you try on lipsticks at the store, Janice. You use them and put them back, right?”

Janice froze, her eyes darting between me and Mike. I could almost see the gears turning in her head.

“That’s… that’s different,” she stammered. “This is food. People eat this.”

“And people put lipstick on their mouths,” I countered gently. “Isn’t that kind of the same thing?”

The color drained from Janice’s face. She stared at the basket of breadsticks, then at her hands, as if seeing them for the first time. Without another word, she turned and walked away, leaving me standing there with Mike.

“Thanks, man,” I whispered, passing him the money I owed him.

I caught up with Janice in the produce section. She was unnaturally quiet, her eyes distant as she mechanically placed apples in our cart.

“You okay?” I asked, trying to keep the satisfaction out of my voice.

She nodded absently. “Fine. Just… thinking.”

We finished our shopping in silence, the usual chatter conspicuously absent. As we loaded the groceries into the car, Janice suddenly spoke up.

“Ella?” Her voice was small, uncertain. “Do you think anyone’s ever done that to the food I’ve bought?”

I paused, a bag of potatoes halfway to the trunk. This was it, the moment of truth.

“I don’t know, Janice,” I said carefully. “I guess it’s possible. You never really know what happens to things before you buy them, right?”

She nodded slowly, her brow furrowed in thought. We finished loading the car in silence, but I could feel the shift in the air.

On the drive home, Janice cleared her throat. “I’ve been thinking,” she began hesitantly. “Maybe I should stop testing the lipsticks at the store.”

I nearly swerved off the road in shock. “Oh?”

“Yes, well,” she fidgeted with her purse strap, “I suppose it’s not very considerate to others. And, well, you never know who might have touched them before, right?”

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. Had it worked? Had my crazy plan actually gotten through to her?

As we pulled into the driveway, Janice turned to me, a wry smile on her face. “You planned this, didn’t you? The man with the breadstick?”

Busted. I felt my cheeks burn as I scrambled for an explanation. “I… well… you see…”

But Janice just laughed, a genuine, warm laugh I hadn’t heard in weeks. “Oh, Ella. You are something else, you know that? I should be mad, but… I guess I needed that wake-up call.”

Relief washed over me. “So, you’re not angry?”

She shook her head, still chuckling. “No, not angry. Impressed, actually. And maybe a little embarrassed that it took a staged breadstick incident to knock some sense into me.”

We sat there for a moment, the tension of the past weeks melting away. Then Janice reached over and squeezed my hand.

“Thank you,” she said softly. “For caring enough to go to such lengths. I’m sorry for being so stubborn.”

I squeezed back, feeling a lump form in my throat. “That’s what family does, right? We look out for each other, even if it means resorting to elaborate grocery store schemes.”

Janice laughed again, and this time, I joined in. As we carried the groceries inside, chatting and joking like we used to, I couldn’t help but feel a surge of affection for this stubborn, infuriating, wonderful woman who’d become such an important part of my life.

Here’s another story: A store assistant dared to bring MY wife to tears by being mean. She did that all because my spouse sought employment at the establishment she worked at. After hearing my wife’s tale, I took action to redress the situation. What I did ensured that the assistant would think twice when addressing anyone else! Click here to read more.

This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.

The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.